Adults Should Respect Children Too
It is very common to see how adults tell children that they should respect their elders. This statement, which seems to convey solid and important values, sometimes contradicts itself because of the behavior of adults themselves. The little ones have to respect, but don’t they also deserve to be respected in the same way?
We often mistakenly treat children as second-class citizens. Due to their young age and life experience, we sometimes neglect their opinions, desires and feelings. The adult-centered society in which we live does not give enough space or value to our children’s wonderful inner world.
We rarely stop to look at the world from the point of view of the little ones, to understand their perceptions, to listen to their needs. We feel that they belong to us and that we have control over them when, in fact, our mission is to guide them in their own personal development. In other words, accompany them and promote their self-esteem and security.
Do we teach by example?
We demand that children adapt to what we want from them. May they be obedient, that they listen to us, that they listen and carry out our orders. We reprimand them when they shout, respond or disagree with us. But have we stopped to reflect on our own attitudes?
How many times do we ignore a child while he is telling something? How many times have we told you to wait, because we don’t have time now, or not to bother? In how many situations do we lose patience and raise our voice, even using offensive words? How many times do we answer “no” to their requests, with no explanation other than “why not” ?
Why, then, do we demand a respect we don’t offer? Children also deserve to be listened to and taken into consideration. They also deserve to be treated with dignity, respect, love and compassion.
We all find it inconceivable to yell at a guest if he spills his drink at dinner. However, we don’t hesitate to do this when it comes to a child.
We don’t think about telling a friend, “ Shut up for a moment, how boring you are” while he’s saying something that’s important to him. However, we do this with our children. Likewise, what would happen if a child yelled at us or told us to shut up? That would be considered an intolerable disrespect. Why are rules only one-sided?
Do we just need to respect our elders?
As we can see, the message behind a “respect your elders” is unfair and biased. Children resign themselves to being treated tactlessly by adults, but then repeat this model.
Thus, it is common to see older children ignoring or treating other younger children with contempt. It’s easy to understand where this behavior comes from. We are sending the information that the minor must respect the major, but not the other way around.
The message we really should get across is to treat everyone with respect. So let’s start respecting children as well. In doing so, we will be a great role model for them, as they will learn to be understanding and kind to others.
In addition, we will also build their self-esteem and teach them that they are valuable and deserve respect. That way, they will understand that this is natural and healthy and will not accept that other people belittle, insult or humiliate them.
The information conveyed when children are young is extremely powerful. Make sure they get the message loud and clear that they should be treated with dignity.
We must also respect children.
Therefore, we will try to reflect and modify our behavior if necessary. We are all human, no one is perfect, but it is wise to correct ourselves when we understand that we can do something better.
Let’s start listening to the little ones when they speak, paying attention and showing interest in their opinions. We should listen to their reasons and talk to them when we don’t allow something. Let’s show them that we trust their ability to understand and empathize.
Likewise, let’s talk to children without raising your voice and without offensive words. The message will arrive in the same way if sent with respect. We must also ensure that other adults around us treat our children respectfully. Thus, we will be able to educate self-confident and compassionate people with others.
