Growing Up As An Only Child
More and more families are limiting their offspring to a single child. Both for medical reasons and for personal decisions, this family model is increasing more and more. So, in this article, we’re going to demystify and try to clarify what it really means to grow up as an only child.
grow up as an only child
Currently, we are faced with a very different social panorama from the old one in relation to the family. The birth rate is decreasing further and so is the fertility rate (that is, the average number of children per woman).
This shows us the growing tendency of society towards a phenomenon that once seemed to be a special circumstance: families with an only child. There are many beliefs associated with children (and adults) who grow up without siblings, but what is true about these stereotypes?
Advantages of growing up as an only child
Only children receive more attention from their parents. They develop their work with exclusive dedication, as they do not have to share their time and affection. As a result, these children often feel supported and well cared for and thus develop good self-esteem.
Parents who have only one child often have more financial resources to offer, which allows the child to have a greater variety of experiences in different areas of life.
These children grow up in a world of adults and in constant contact with them. Thus, they become the references to be imitated and your main source of interaction.
This circumstance brings with it a greater development of creativity, imagination and mental flexibility. For the same reason, only children generally have faster intellectual (linguistic and cognitive) development.
Because they don’t have siblings, they need to spend a lot of time alone. Mainly because adults are adults and can’t play with them all the time.
Therefore, they know how to adapt to loneliness, developing hobbies and taking advantage of it as a way of getting to know themselves and being more independent. Furthermore, they are calmer, more introverted and mature children.
Only children have no one to “play the blame” or to share it with. Therefore, they learn from an early age to accept their responsibilities. This makes them more efficient people in life and work.
Disadvantages of growing up as an only child
The downside of a parent’s greater dedication is excessive attention. If that happens, the child can become spoiled. In addition, if excessive attention results in overprotection, this can result in a child with a shy, fearful, and more cautious personality than normal.
Not having a family environment in which to compete, play and share with their peers makes it difficult to develop certain skills.
Thus, only children generally have more difficulty negotiating their needs with others. In that sense, confrontation is a big problem because they don’t know how to handle this kind of situation.
In addition, they may have problems being generous, both materially and emotionally, and tend to think that everyone should take care of themselves. Added to this individuality, egocentrism can also appear.
These children are often treated as adults because of their greater maturity, which can limit their spontaneity and make them too rigid.
Sometimes, they can feel lonely for not having the complicity at home that peers provide. This can lead to a withdrawn and reserved personality.
What to do to avoid the disadvantages?
- It is essential to set affectionate boundaries, so that the child learns to respect the time of others and tolerate “no” for an answer.
- Instead of overprotecting, we should offer the child the chance to learn to develop in the world on their own.
- To avoid self-centeredness, we must teach her to share, respect the turn of others or understand that, unlike what happens at home, the attention and praise of adults will not always be directed to her.
- In addition, it will be necessary to provide sufficient socialization situations with other children, especially with the invaluable figure of cousins.
- Although the child looks mature, we must not forget that he is still a child. Therefore, it is important to give space to your spontaneity.
- Finally, to alleviate the subjective feeling of loneliness, it is important to always provide support and understanding in your immediate surroundings.
