Mom, Do You Feel Drained At The End Of The Day?

“What? You are married? But the only thing you did was take care of the baby!” If anyone has ever said that to you, try to defend yourself forcefully.

According to experts, the exhaustion of mothers is justified and even has a name: “stress due to excessive surveillance”.

The situation, as we already know, gets much more complicated when we balance work responsibilities with raising children.   However, something that many mothers feel as an undeniable pressure is the fact that they cannot “complain” about the tiredness and stress if they decide to stay at home for a few months or years to dedicate themselves exclusively to raising their children.

It’s like they don’t have the right to be burnt out.  How to feed, take care, guide, teach and educate was extremely easy. As if the children were already “factory raised” and the mother only had to supervise.

It’s not like this. In I’m Mommy we want to talk about this not-so-known subject that shouldn’t go unnoticed: the stress caused by excessive surveillance.

At the end of the day you are exhausted and these are the reasons

Let’s start by defining what excessive surveillance stress is. It is a state of mental and sensory hypersensitivity caused by specific facts: detecting threats and dangers.

• This psychological pressure makes the person feel drained and more tired than usual. She is even more irritated than usual.

However, the curious thing about all this is that, generally, the stress caused by excessive surveillance is associated “with soldiers and with military contexts”.

• A soldier must be aware of any possible threats that may appear around him. You must observe, pay attention, predict and always be alert in order to survive and keep your team safe as well.
• Maintaining this state for a few weeks or months ends up creating a lot of stress, to which extreme tiredness and mental exhaustion are added.

You’re not a soldier, but almost…

The same is true with child rearing. It may sound ironic, but it’s definitely not. Mothers – and fathers alike – should be on the lookout for, for example, picking up the baby every three hours.

• It is necessary to console crying at night. In fact, many mothers wake up in the middle of the night to see if their children “are all right” or because they thought they heard a cry when in fact nothing happened.
• As the little ones grow, the dangers increase. So a mother needs to be aware of everything. She must pay attention so that the little ones don’t swallow certain objects, don’t fall, don’t climb in certain places, don’t turn over in the crib.

You’re exhausted because all your senses are on alert, like an alarm on 24 hours a day.   It’s not just about basic tasks like food and hygiene. We talk above all about mental pressure, the desire for everything to be all right, for our child to be safe, happy, peaceful… Because sometimes a little carelessness can cause an accident, a fall. These are some of the things that we are very afraid of.

So, if someone gives an ironic answer to the fact that you are exhausted at the end of the day, defend yourself! Your job is like that of a soldier on a battlefield. It is necessary to ensure the safety of what is most precious to you in the world: your child.

Basic rules for managing exhaustion

Being a mother is a job that goes beyond the tasks performed 24 hours a day. It’s something you’ve known for a long time and you’re more than aware of it. In the same way, you know that this job, the job of being a mother, makes you happy and it’s the best thing that could have happened.

However, you need to be attentive to be able to give your best to your children.   It’s worth following this advice.

• Delegate tasks. Raising a child is the couple’s responsibility. If you build a single parent family, don’t hesitate to ask your family for help whenever you can.
• Do not maximize hazards. Don’t imagine the worst until you get to the point where you can’t sleep at night thinking your child might fall out of his crib or choke because you’ve covered him with a blanket. Focus on things, but with ease.
• Don’t spend all day at home. Go out with your child whenever possible.
• Try to eat properly. Take the opportunity to rest when your child is taking a nap. A few minutes of rest on the couch helps us to recover, air and clear our minds.

Don’t let what others say get to you. You have the right to complain and even to ask for help if at any point you feel overwhelmed. Try to do something throughout the day that brings you pleasure and relax: read a book, take a walk for a few minutes…  You won’t be a bad mother if you rest for a few moments during the day.